I am a part of I Had Cancer.com and it is an amazing place for me to share my story, heal and grow. The creator of the site, Mailet Lopez wrote a piece yesterday and asked us to share:
1. What have we learned
2. What is it that we wish we knew before
3. What has surprised you
She is right when she says there are few moments you will never forget quite like that moment you hear you have cancer. That moment is one of extreme out of body feelings. It is like being hit by a ton of bricks. Your world as you know it stops. You don't know how to act, think or move forward. It is like you are living in another dimension. That dimension is fear. Life before diagnosis seems like a dream. You go through guilt for all the things you knew better but didn't do right. You have regrets. You wonder what is going to happen. You become dependant on your Oncologist and chemo nurses to help you through. You learn who your friends are and who don't know how to cope with the C word.
Cancer can be isolating. People run from your life. You have expectations of people which now I have learned we shouldn't have.
But what cancer couldn't do was kill my spirit. That was the blessing. When I finally realized why not me I started to grow and to heal.
The word cancer is just a word. We give it power or not. We give it fear or not. This is what I learned. I had to stay strong. I met my strength. I turned to God to help me. Then I started to feel my family in spirit and I felt my angels and I felt guided to healing myself through alternative routes.
What I wish I knew before was that I only ever had me to rely on through it. Me and God. And that was enough. I remained compliant with my dr and medical team while exploring other options. I learned to change my thoughts. I chose happy. I count my blessings. I truly believe I now show up in life wiser, stronger, braver and healing like never before.
What has surprised me is the deep courage I have. I tapped into that power of God and I am healing and I am not only surviving, I am thriving!!!
Life after cancer has been enlightening. I don't thank Cancer but I thank God for what it taught me. I thank God for this new life.
I have met my soul and I have become one with all there is. I know the truth that I am an individual expression of Divine love.
I choose not to remember all the hard days. I focus on all the love. I have learned to be present in each day. I left an old job and created a new life working and playing with angels. I get better and better every day. I have learned to love myself enough to finally standup and be me! I am not a perfect person but I know I am perfect to God.
These days I share love, light and healing. I know that I am not the same me that went to surgery that day in Aug 2011. It has been about 1795 days since I was diagnosed and I can say I HAD CANCER and LIFE AFTER DIAGNOSIS has been a journey of Love, Light and Healing.
If I can help you at all. Please contact me. I am ready to be of service.
Cancer is just a word. TRUST GOD. ALL IS WELL. I AM SAFE. I AM HEALING. I AM LOVE.
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