When your child grows up
It's only Tuesday and it feels like a long week. Why you may ask? Because it is the last 5 days of school for my son who is 18 and who graduated last week. Being an empath, I can feel and sense his sadness.
He has always had to have extra support through transitions. What makes it different this time is that so much more falls on me than ever before. His team of support in the medical community has shifted because he is considered an adult. We are in between so many different health care workers. Having him transition into the adult world is a process.
I can really see how a part of my healing has prepared me to help support Paulo jr through this time.
"TRUST THE PROCESS" is the message God and the angels remind me daily.
I keep hearing Sunny's words in my head : Kids come to you and through you but don't belong to you..... you are here to guide them , support them, care for and love them. Ultimately they have their own experiences to live through.
Being so connected to God is a gift, but sometimes I second guess everything. Am I making the right decisions with him? Am I allowing him to make too many adult decisions that I should control more??? No don't control him, my mentor says. She says allow him to have his own experiences. As I sit here with tears streaming down my face, I ask God and Mother Mary and all my angels and guides for help and support. We have made it this far. We have come through the special needs education system. We continue to navigate through the special needs medical system. We have gone through epilepsy and have walked through cancer. We have cried through deaths of important family members and have shared tears when friends return to heaven too...
" Stay in Faith Julie," I hear God say. "Trust me"- he says. But a part of me is scared. So I tell that ego to buzz off. I stay in faith. I will ground myself and I will pray for guidance. I will ask God to give me clear signs I understand and I will continue to move him and me in the direction of his dreams.
Paulo has a unique position.. he really can pursue all his dreams and not worry so much about money... and he has me at his side. I thank God for the path he has created for me as I see I am so very blessed to hold Paulo's hand through this next stage so much closer than if I was at a 9-5 job. I am here for him. I am his mom and his guide and it is the best job in the world. I may not be perfect, and I may scream and yell sometimes, but God thought I was perfect for this amazing soul who is my son. How blessed am I? Thank you God. We have come through so much life and being firmly rooted with our Creator is how you get through all the muck. We are never alone. That is where our strength is. So as we both turn the page on this next chapter, I have so many people to thank for the help along the way.... our family and friends and all the teachers - Thank you!
May God bless us all and may you all know He is available to you anytime. Talk to Him. He always helps. To my son, I want to say "Congratulations!" I am so proud of you. You are a great young man. You are gentle and kind. You have a big heart and you are smart and gifted. God loves you and I love you. We have so much to look forward to. Daddy and I wish you all the success and health in the world. God bless you dear son. <3
Paulo's baby photo. 1998
yesterday outside his drama class.. looking so forlorn. Its ok buddy.. Momma's here. xo
Joshua 1:9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”
Isaiah 41:10Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
Deuteronomy 31:6 Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.”
Matthew 28:20 Teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.”
Hebrews 13:5Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.”
Romans 8:38-39 For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.
1 Corinthians 3:16Do you not know that you are God's temple and that God's Spirit dwells in you?
Matthew 6:25-34 “Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. ...
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